Bad Haircuts + Life Lessons

By Shona Gates, Sexy Selfish


STORY time with Shona…. and hold on to the end because, like Elle Woods in legally blonde… my haircut story does have a point. 


Today I had the worst blow dry of my life ….  


She was an apprentice, she was new, she will learn and everyone has to learn somewhere right. So, this is no hate on her. My regular hair dresser who has been taming my locks for the past 8 years was busy cutting my daughter’s hair, so the beautiful apprentice got stuck with my unruly mop.


She took to my scalp with a blow dryer like her life depended on it, vigorously fingering and roughing up my hair to try and get the hot air through it.


She was serious … she was dead set, she went in balls to the wall …. and good on her, but about 30 seconds in I KNEW with 100% certainty this was not going to work. 


I have VERY thick, VERY long, super absorbent hair that takes about 12 hours to naturally air dry. It’s full of waves, curls, kinks, cowlicks and just weird curly frizzy girl magic. Even with half of it shaved (I have an undercut), it’s still A LOT of hair!!!


If and when I do have to blow dry my hair (which isn’t very often considering I don’t even own one) there’s only one way that works. After 25 years of trial and error … flip my entire head upside down …. blast the roots, then blowdry down the shaft while shaking my head back and forth slightly. 


Can you picture it? 


Yeah, not exactly something you can ask to do in the hair dressers. 


So, 20 minutes of aggressively finger fucking my scalp later, my hair was slightly dryer.. but really just a-frissez up ,tangled, mess of a sore scalp.


But that 20 minutes before my regular hair dresser took over, gave me time to think. 


And I started to ponder on the fact that hair dressers may be experts in their field, may have experience with hundreds of women’s hair, may be able to recommend cuts, styles, colours and products to help me … But no one, no one… knows my hair like me. 


Just like no one knows my business like me. NO one knows my kids like me … there are just some things in life where you have to trust YOU!


If there is anything I’ve learnt over the years in my business, it is a coach, like a hairdresser who can recommend all the strategy, all the styles, all the products in the world, but only YOU have to actually get up and style your hair every day you only have to get up each day and run your business and work with your clients. 


The buck stops with YOU!


Get support, get advice, get recommendations, and find a mentor, a coach and expert, even a hair dresser who will work with you towards your goals in a way that suits YOUR business/hair and your lifestyle and time commitments. 


But you are the boss, of your hair, your business… all of it! So make the best choice for you.


Stand in your power

Stay in your truth 

Trust yourself 


You got this sis 

x Shona